Drifter wrote:

Don't get mad Mike, just play en wit ya.
Have a nice weekend.

Drifter...

A small zoo in West Canada obtained a very rare species of gorilla.

Within a few weeks the gorilla, a female, became very difficult to handle.

Upon examination, the veterinarian determined the problem. The gorilla was
in heat.

To make matters worse, there was no male gorilla available.

Thinking about their problem, the Zoo Keeper thought of Mikie II, a
redneck part-time worker responsible for cleaning the animal cages.

Mikie II, like most rednecks, had little sense but possessed ample ability
to satisfy a female of any species.

The Zoo Keeper thought they might have a solution. Mikie II was
approached with a proposition. Would he be willing to mate with the gorilla
for $500.00?

Mikie II showed some interest, but said he would have to think the
matter over carefully. The following day, he announced that he would
accept their offer, but only under five conditions:

'First', Mikie II said, 'I ain't gonna kiss her on the lips.' The
Keeper quickly agreed to this condition.

'Second', he said, 'She must wear a 'Dale Earnhardt Forever' T-Shirt.'
The keeper again readily agreed to this condition.

'Third', he said, 'you can't never tell no one about this.' The keeper
again readily agreed to this condition.

'Fourth', Mikie II said, 'I want all the children raised Southern
Canadian Baptist.
Once again it was agreed.

'And last,' Mikie II said, 'I'll need another week to come up with the
$500.00

I think it'd take the idiot a lot longer than a week, as I understand he's not
working that shine box biz to its full potential, but, with the incentive of
having sex with a gorilla, he may get moving rather quickly.