Subject: TELEPHONE PROBLEMS




An elderly lady called her telephone company to report that her
telephone failed to ring when her friends called - and that on the few
occasions when it did ring, her pet dog always moaned right before the
phone rang. The telephone repairman proceeded to the scene, curious to
see this psychic dog or senile elderly lady.


He climbed a nearby telephone pole, hooked in his test set, and dialed
the subscriber's house. The phone didn't ring right away, but then the
dog moaned loudly and the telephone began to ring.


Climbing down from the pole, the telephone repairman found:


1. The dog was tied to the telephone system's ground wire via a steel
chain and collar.


2. The wire connection to the ground rod was loose.


3. The dog was receiving 90 volts of signaling current when the phone
number was called.


4. After a couple of such jolts, the dog would start moaning and then
urinate on himself
and the ground.


5. The wet ground would complete the circuit, thus causing the phone to
ring.





Which demonstrates that some problems CAN be fixed by ****ing and
moaning.




--
KC8TCQ

Know thyself. If you need
help, call the C.I.A.